This is a sad post, so if you’re feeling down and don’t want to be brought down further, please click away today. I won’t be offended.
I woke up on January 1, 2013 a little anxious, although I didn’t know why. I shook my head, gave myself a talking to and went on to set my intentions for 2013. It took me a few weeks, unusual for me, and I should have known then that something was up. As the days became weeks I remained unsettled. Often sad. And I couldn’t figure out why. 2012 was a good year and I thought 2013 might be as well so why was I feeling anxious? Sad?
Then I got my answer: people I knew started to get sick and die. Death, one of the only guarantees we have in this life, has touched me and mine many times these past few weeks. To date (and I really hate writing that) six people, six lovely, special people, have died. I cry for my father-in-law with the twinkly blue eyes died. I wipe tears away for my former brother-in-law, the laid-back California guy, who died after a brief illness during which he exhibited an intense attempt to live; I ache for my valiant niece who made so many tough but necessary decisions about her Dad’s care. And I cry for my girlfriend who will bury her humorous and caring husband and her Dad this week.
Family and friends are hurting. So today I write about our sadness. Our tears. I know that after the tears comes healing. After the intense sadness comes acceptance. That’s what I’ll be looking toward. And helping my family and friends do the same. Tomorrow is another day; we will begin anew. Lord, give us strength.